For My Mother

It was February 4, 2018. The day before was my mother's funeral and I had been hosting her best friend, affectionately my Aunt and also a close friend of mine now, at my house while we finalized the plans and held the funeral. Everyone was exhausted physically and emotionally and it was the day that Aunt Shell had to return home and everyone was supposed to start getting back to life. Shell and I went out for coffee that afternoon at one of my favorite coffee shops and settled down at a table near the window to relax and chat before she began her drive home.

As we talked and reminisced, I noticed that snow had began falling. It started off slow and light but it soon picked up and began to stick to the streets and houses so we decided to pack up early and get her on the road to be safe. 

After we said our goodbyes and she was on the road, I decided that it would be good to keep my mind busy so I packed up my camera bag and headed to my favorite place to take sunset photos: Creve Coeur Park.

I can't remember the actual temperature but it was COLD. Everything around me was frozen and the only other person that I saw on this venture was bundled in multiple layers with a hat and boots. For me, though, the cold was rejuvenating and exhilarating. At one point, as I was shooting, my right index finger went numb from cold and never came back to feeling until I was in my car, about halfway home.

As the snow fell, it filled the crevices created by visitors as they walked the beach. The scene in front of me was becoming exceedingly serene and, though it was quite literally freezing, I wanted to stay for the rest of the night.

With this photo, I largely wanted to capture how calmingly silent this scene was, which is a challenge when audio isn't part of the art. The more snow that accumulated, the more it seemed to absorb the noise of the city and the busy street that goes by and through the park. It was truly silent, except for my footsteps through the sand, and I was lost in it. For the first time since my mom had passed, my mind was in a tranquil state, and I wanted to capture this feeling in an image.